We still say too little or one -sided men’s menopause. The reason may be that it is regarded as "the problem of the annoying kinds of women" —Looks hysterical women.If we can let go of the cramped, covered, degraded, and annoying in front of the "menopause", put it into the traditional puzzle of psychoanalytic, or where can we discover where our confusion and uncertain fate comes from.
Summer always exudes high -density energy.For the family, it means that children return home from school to the pressure of coexistence and entrance examinations.This summer after the college entrance examination, even if it is a dull attitude towards winter, cold and summer, the presence of this holiday cannot be underestimated, because the end of this summer is separated.Leaving the nest, in the entanglement of the past culture and natural laws, often interpreted the maternal, child, father and son relationship.However, the complexity and pain of the separation of mother and daughter relationships cannot be dismantled by each other’s recognition of each other.Daughter’s departure often occurs at the same period as her mother’s menopause.At this stage, the mother often felt unable to connect her work and creativity, and felt that she was tortured by her daughter’s "problem".It is necessary to allow the individualization process to develop healthily, rather than binding to grow together in a bad state that is unclear in the boundary, and we must pay the efforts of Superman.
It is better to say that there is a real mother -daughter relationship behind the menopause.Faced with the decay of women’s bodies, and her mother’s annoyance of her aging body, her daughter felt in addition to terrible deterrents, as well as things that were never been suppressed in the tradition of civilization.Seeing the truth of fighting with each other is the task of focusing on the symptoms of mother and daughter relationship.
Today’s article, through the hot summer temperature, start with a recently published new book "Hot You", and talk to you about the physiological and spiritual changes of menopausal.Most readers who read our readers may not be in menopause, but you must have inspected the change of your mother as a child’s body when facing aging.In fact, this problem is not only related to the mother.
No longer the hot night
The mothers around the children will think that they have just walked through their "life test", and they are about to face the important stage of their children away from home, and they are also another big test.The best -selling writer and German gynecologist Hila Delitz fiercely refuted the old prejudice. In this prejudice, women’s menopause is regarded as an emotional problem and is equivalent to the "empty nest syndrome" painting.She believes: "When this concept appeared, most women were still housewives. At that time, women’s identity was mainly defined as mothers. I personally think that the concept of" empty nest syndrome ‘is not suitable for the current situation.When my colleagues used this word, I was even a little annoyed, because they seemed to be assumed that women only played the role of mother. There were many factors that caused low emotions: work, friends, and husband and wife relationships. Therefore, ’empty nest syndrome syndrome’It is an outdated concept that ignores women’s lives in many ways. "She contributed a" removing charm "from science, that is, regarding women’s physical problems as mysterious, emotional, and secondary health issues,And pointed out to what extent medicine lacks exploration of women’s bodies.
"Hot You", author: [Germany] Hillary Delitz / [De] Louisa Schtomol, Translator: Ma Xin Lake, Version: Beijing Science and Technology Publishing House in June 2023
In the book "Hot You", she proposed that the decline of estrogen in menopause is accompanied by the high risk of cardiovascular disease, but women’s heart disease cannot be identified in time. This is because the "classic" introduced by the media and medical consultantsSymptoms of myocardial infarction are symptoms of men: severe cardiac pain to diverge on the left arm and lower sip, and feel abnormal.The symptoms of female myocardial infarction may be different, which causes women to be unable to distinguish and rescue in time when a heart attack is onset.The reason for this phenomenon is that only men in most studies are men, so the symptoms in the guidelines of heart disease are symptoms of the onset of male patients.Many people did not expect that symptoms may be different.
On the other hand, those healthy symptoms for women, such as menopause, are regarded as emotional problems. Even in recent years, many doctors will recommend patients for treatment with anti -depression drugs.In fact, women’s risk of death from cardiovascular disease is at least three times that of breast cancer.A study in the United States even showed that nearly 40,000 women died in breast cancer in the United States in a year, and 400,000 women died in myocardial infarction.However, most people believe that breast cancer is the number one killer to kill women.
What makes the female gynecologist even more mood is that those who are hidden and have not been fully discussed and discussed, and women to endure for generations to endure.
As a physiological scale of "becoming a woman", menstruation and pregnancy are passed from generation to generation between mother and daughter about common sense, illness, shame, openness, and identity.The understanding of menopause may never reach the level that we once know menstruation.Because the teaching of menstruation or pregnancy is often between the mother and the young daughter, but in the age of men, when women reach this stage, she is an adult who is standing up.With the female elders who can be granted to provide experience and care around them, menopausal women have always endured it alone. It may explode to a hysteria that sweeps the people around them.Outbreak, but when they are suffering, they can really share them.
Stills of "Aunt’s Postmodern Life".
Another reason why women choose silently to endure pain is that the symptoms of menopause are always accompanied by a kind of annihilation and shame.
"There are too many menstruation, too little, or irregular; hot heat, night night sweats; depression; anxiety or anxiety aggravation; easy to anger; there are sleep disorders; ‘head of the head’, difficult to think or memory; hair loss; skin itching and other other skin and other other skin, other skin and othersSkin problems, such as urticaria, neurotic dermatitis, eczema; joint pain; migraine or headache; dizziness; arrhythmia; frequent cystitis; frequent nights; tinnitus, damage to hearing; weight gain, especially abdominal fat increases increase; Sexual intercourse pain; no interest in intimacy; the vagina is burning; vaginal itching, abnormal secretions. "
In all the menopausal symptoms listed in "Hot You", we heard or experienced parts, but it is difficult to observe and understand all, or when we see that some symptoms appear on a woman (especially anxiety and irritability), we like it.Shunkou believes that "she is menopause." This allegations with "aging, abnormal, no longer attractive" make women face this normal body cycle more and more hidden into the silent shadow.
The purpose of Hila Delitz is to allow more women who are about to experience and are being experienced to understand the law of changes in human hormones, and have been treated with symptomatic hormones.In her diagnosis and treatment plan, each symptom that appears in menopause can be relieved and conditioned through hormone testing, monitoring and drug regulation.This is actually a field that women are good at, self -monitoring and inspection, and in line with their laws. Medicine has proposed a corresponding solution that allows women to understand menopausal, and their bodies more directly and frankly.
Another important information is that women’s menopause does not start with menopause. The so -called "menopause" is also a pseudo -proposition, because if hormonal conditioning is used, "menstrual blood" may be theoretically available for life, but that is not true menstruation.Most people’s menstrual periods have begun from the age of 38 to 44. At this time, there will be a slight, incompetent hormone level change. At this time, menstruation is still regular, but menopause may have begun, and the duration can reach 10 years.
The "big test" mentioned earlier was opened from this stage.The progress of medicine exposes the light of rationality to the woman’s body (the rational sunlight was so lacking of negative, and everything was left in the night through the moon phase) may reduce the loneliness and pain of women’s body and mind, from the popularity of understanding to the true understanding to the true understanding to the trueHow long is the popularity of medical resources, just see the war about sanitary napkins today.In any case, this hope gives us greater hope about the body’s autonomy, but the "shadow", shrouded in us, the collective and unconscious symbolic ghost entangled in our dreams, to eliminate them, and there is still them, and there are still them, and there are still them, and there are still them, and there is still them, and there is still them, and there are still them, and there is still them, and there is still them.To do more deeper torture.
Menopausal is a "leaving syndrome"?
Female writers have a keen tentacle about menopause issues. In their opinion, menopause shows that we all have the opportunity to earn away from the suffocation of the past and embrace the freedom of the next stage.of.Japanese writer Itoi Lv Mei wrote in the Memoral Memorals:
"At the age of twenty -nine, I wrote a poem entitled" Killing Lu Naizi ". For a long time, I have been reciting this poem. The poem has written in my daughter Lu Naiko for six months, eatingI bite my nipples during milk. I can’t read this poem now. The so -called biting nipples are gone. I have to kill my daughter and disappear.. Big daughter Lu Naizi has finished me, left home, and established her own. I was killed by Lu Naizi without a fight. "
What she described, the metaphorical murder contained in the separation of the mother and daughter is not completely painful, but more like a gap and differences. They want to build their own lives.
"Amenorrhea", author: [Day] Ito Bilu Mei, Translator: Reck, version: one page Folio | Guangxi Normal University Press, July 2022
Separate repeatedly in our lives.From the coexistence with the mother to the self, every wing of the self is accompanied by a contusion.We remember that in the process of growing up, our mother kept asking us if we grew up and no longer said to love her?Initially, we asked our mother with action at the infant stage.Mother’s companionship, sound, and breasts disappear, the baby will experience the pain and fear of separation, and the mental murder will cause it.But through separation, through the externalization of our own voice, we have the ability to distinguish ourselves and others. Separation is a driving force. The same is true of separation at this stage of menopausal.
We can face up to the dark side of the soul, and the god of love and Tanasus are combined here in some Frankenstein -style strange way.In the extensive dependence between mothers and children, we can see from the behavior of childhood and kill insect children from a stage of childhood. In the separation stage, the child has the needs of controlling the universe.The desire, this is the first challenge in our lives, and the first step in our freedom to go to individuals.In the relationship between mother and daughter, this spiritual fighting is more complicated. The daughters come from the mother, and are given the collective needs of the future mothers by the patriarchal.Relations are often regarded as betrayal of mother and daughter relationship.
The separation of daughter and mother is covered with shadows. There, women are often caught in unconscious identity with mother.In a dynamic relationship, her daughter needs to face her own wisdom to face the heavy level.The child is constantly encouraged to return to the original self (the "cultural" history passed down from generation to generation is the new knot of the father and son’s civilization). She may lose interest in exploring herself, and she has to face her mother’s annoyance.In the relationship between mother and son and father and son, realizing that parents are not universal, and in the face of parents are not "full good" or "full evil" are an important step in separation topics.Become a mother’s essential self.
Stills of "Forty Women".
However, the soul has also been given the power of fighting with the dark side.Girl, mother and old woman, the three characters in mythology constitute three stages of women’s life. They are part of women’s consciousness. With the wisdom of age, Herku provides transcendence in the life and death of the world.Looking at, she has the ability to penetrate time and shines freely.See, women’s lives are so complete, and there is a power in the old man to guide our freedom.
This is exactly what Ito Bami wrote "Amenorrhea" during the menopause: "However, the mother is tough and will slowly Su Sheng in Jedi and emerge from the new bud.He is "mother ‘, and I asked for help from those who had been killed. I couldn’t help but worry about it, send her money to help kill my deer to spend difficulties.The topic of aging is from Ito’s view to a new force and freedom.
Menopausal mother and daughter who leave the nest,
We all look forward to freedom and rebirth
How do we know the uterus determine how we know ourselves and the world.In Taoist elements, the uterus is a toad salvaged from the sea of filth. This negative element often guides the protagonist in fairy tales of various countries and starts to adventure.It guides the protagonist to find the moon, the sun, gemstone and love, let them ask for love to the other half, defeat the enemy, and will also become evil when the protagonist’s newly married night, or to end the journey, and when it is separated from it.The myth analysis of the Jung Pai will the ideal female element -Anima, which is regarded as the control of the rigid father or mother that corresponds to Anims, get rid of the shadow of bad wizards and bad kings, and help the protagonist find obey.The soul flows to the smart element of life.In the story of the prince, Anima’s guidance accompanied the protagonist to defeat the king. In the story of the princess/female female, the positive element of Anims.This is common to Freud’s claim that his father plays the "umbilical cord cutter" between mother and daughter.
"Mother and Daughter Self" Author: [Mei] Jane Goldberg, Translator: Fang Huijia / Qiu Cen, Version: Zhonghe Chenhui | Taiwan Strait Publishing House February 2023
This is a symmetrical interpretation of Oedipus myth.Father existed in the triangle of "family Romance" in the relationship between mother and daughter. Freud also proposed that at the stage of the child’s birth, the father often conveyed the negative energy full of resentment.Between forcing them to separate, and in the subconscious, the mother will try to eliminate the influence of his father and try to squeeze him out of the symbiotic relationship between the mother and child.If the father’s first and real other people have positively affected, the child accepts his father as a mother and his protector, and at the same time, the child can have an independent personality.Avoid what Jung said, the energy of the mother or father was too powerful and fell into the shadow of the soul.
Stills of "Aunt’s World".
We feel more and more that the programming of this set of mythology to maternal and child relationships cannot be copied smoothly into the mother and daughter relationship.Menopausal is the significant moment of fighting between mother and daughter.Goldberg first pointed out that sex is the first time that the mother regards her daughter’s first betrayal of herself. Mother who is no longer active in menopausal life is deeply jealous of her daughter.Recognize her.In the face of the decay of the mother’s fertility, her daughter witnessed the fragmented woman’s body at the first scene, which is with her herself.Picture scene.Ito Blumi wrote:
"Friends tell me that whether it is menopausal symptoms or postpartum depression, hormones are in trouble, and anyone may experience it. Even so, even if my mother is affected by hormones, from the perspective of my daughter, my mother’s motherIn fact, it is very disgusting to be a woman. I feel that these are helpless things. It is handcuffs and punishment for women. Therefore, whether it is blood, her own body, or the daughter who was born from her belly, in her eyes, in her eyes, in her eyes, in her eyes, in her eyes, in her eyes,It may be burdensome. "
Mother does not need to do anything to her daughter, but just facing the annihilation of aging, it brings a kind of denying, and it turns into a self -consciousness in the daughter’s subconsciousness.This is the "low language of the wall" from the uterus.Gradually shrinking vagina and menopausal experience and irritability evoke a hatred similar to the fire of revenge. It intends to kill others between mother and daughter in spirit, and then even more intended to kill her mother.This hatred comes from the fate of the mother and daughter, which is dominated by his father.
"Milk and Eggs", author: Kawagi is not reflected, translator: Yang Wei, version: Shanghai Translation Press, August 2009
In a novel "milk and eggs" by Kawakami, such a tension that cannot ease between mother and daughter.Faced with the mother who suddenly wanted to perform breast enhancement surgery, her daughter Hulu felt strong nausea, and this kind of nausea directly caused her to stop talking.The exit between the language between the mother and daughter is a metaphorical symptom.Because language is the symbiotic relationship between mother and daughter relationships for the first time, and we confirm "I" and "You" by distinguishing between mother and ourselves through distinguishing between mother and ourselves.And crying is the driving force of the evolution of the new leather of the brain. The new leather of the brain is unique to humans, and the language birthday has fallen here.The daughter’s active giving up her voice may mean that she is eager to become integrated with her mother.
In her interpretation, the mother wants to do breast enhancement surgery is hate her body that is aging because of her fertility -hate herself born by her body; she wants to attract men after she leaves college -her mother is separated; Want to become young -like yourself.But the mother did not understand this, and she did not explain her behavior to her daughter from beginning to end in the novel.She denied that she wanted to look young, and her actions had not been voted to any man from beginning to end. Instead, she looked at the chest of other women in the bathroom."Beautiful", maybe what the mother wants to find is just that if they have not been suppressed, they will naturally become themselves.
Stills of "Forty Women".
Become yourself in life, live what Jung said, and live in your own nature.The self -image is a complete circle, a prototype image starting from the tree of the world or the sun, and self -awareness. As Freud said the original self, humans are consistent in human body.When we return to nature, we regain our true self, and can truly live freely.The moon was excluded from this successful icon because of the disabled and yin. The moon became a poison and witchcraft lead in alchemy, which brought unpredictable and unstable factor.
So, how do women become true self?When mothers and daughters want to "find themselves", when they build their own lives, they will break out between them like "milk and eggs".Perhaps the novel assumes that chasing the circle is an unfortunate beginning.Women’s freedom is not that complete circle.In the end, the method of mother and daughter has a more heroic color.They smashed the eggs on their heads, rushed to the other party what they wanted to say, smashed the round, abandon the ovarian nest, and let go of the fertility to declare that we were born complete.
In the summer, the energy of fire is brought, and the gas is upward, and everything is crazy.But the experience of growing on our skin tells us that summer is also chaotic, and it is a sea of dirty.The power of this growth has some homogeneous in the dark night with the trend of women. Here, we pay attention to the complex relationship between mothers and daughters.And discover the complete power of life from it.
Written article/峖 Pei Pei
School pair/Xue Jingning